Jaxon's baby blessing

"Our dear Heavenly Father in the name of Jesus Christ and by the authority of the holy Melchizedek Priesthood which we hold.  We take this infant in our arms to give him a name and a blessing.  The name by which he shall be known on the records of the church and throughout his life on this earth is Jaxon Ray Draper.  Jaxon, at this time we pronounce a blessing upon your head that it may guide you throughout your life. We bless you with a determination and desire to obtain knowledge throughout your life; both secular and spiritual knowledge.  We bless you that you may look to true sources of knowledge; that you may find God in your life.  We bless you with a desire to obtain a testimony of the Gospel and to follow the perfect example of Jesus Christ.  We bless you that you may be humble; that you may serve others, and that you will learn at an early age that the true wealth in this life is obtained by serving others. I bless you that you may be able to overcome temptation; that you may overcome your challenges and your trials, and that through those challenges and trials you will become stronger and you will learn from them.  I bless you with health; that you may be able to accomplish all the things that your Heavenly Father desires of you.  I bless you that you may continue in paths of righteousness and learn from great examples who have gone before you.  I bless you with all these things and all other things that your Heavenly Father has in store for you at this time, and do so in the name of Jesus Christ Amen."

Pronounced 11/9/14 by Allan

Maddox's first haircut

Halloween

Jaxon's Blessing Announcement

Maddox is learning to listen

Maddox... where do I begin?  Maddox is still one very crazy kid.  He has so much energy and I do not.  Up until about 3 months ago, I have to admit that I really believed that I could consider myself patient.  Every time I heard stories about moms who lose it on their kids or have break downs, I would think, "wow, I must be one of the lucky ones."  Well, these past two months have taught me that no, I am not patient and no, I am not one of the lucky ones.  Ha ha.  I have lost it on Maddox and I have had a break down.  But two and a half months later, I am proud to say I am happy and adjusted.  Maddox is such a good boy and every day I realize just how lucky I am to be his mom.  He is learning to listen and has been doing a really good job.  He is such a big helper and loves Jaxy so much.  I am so grateful that he is so affectionate and has never shown an ounce of violence toward other kids.  He is loving and still gives me hugs and kisses all the time.  He still wants to snuggle with me and wants me to hold him.  He is always wanting to kiss Jaxy and get him to smile.  Maddox is the best big brother ever.  Now Maddox does have some weaknesses...A couple weeks ago, I thought it would be a good idea to go to Toddler Time at the library which is where 20+ toddlers sit on the floor of a room sitting right next to their moms and listen to a boring lady read a book with very small pictures in the front of the room.  So Maddox and I get into the room and I have Jaxon in my carrier and we sit down on the rug.  Well Maddox sat down on the rug for 2 seconds.  Then he got up and started running around, climbing on the cupboards, trying to use the sink, opening the door and running out, and screaming when I tried to make him sit down.  After 5 minutes, we were done.  We didn't even get through one book.  As I was walking out of the library, I told myself that this is just who Maddox is.  He is not a toddler that sits quietly and listens to adults read books.  He is not a calm toddler.  He is a crazy, energetic, loud little boy and I'm ok with that.  I can't change him and I don't want to.  But I can try to improve him and that's what we have been working on.  We have been working on his listening skills and him holding my hand and not running away.  Maddox has made great improvement in those areas in the last couple of months and has not run away from me in a while.  When he starts to sprint away, I yell, "Maddox! Stop and listen!" And usually after one or two times of yelling that, he listens and stops or comes back.  Maddox has been practicing telling me when he needs a new diaper.  He still isn't interested in using the toilet but I didn't figure that out until he peed in the corner of the entryway the other day.  He came to me without a diaper on and told me he went "caca" which to him means pee and poop interchangeably.  But I got nervous and told him to show me where and took me to the corner by the front door.  Luckily, it was on the tile but needless to say, I told him not to take off his diaper anymore.  Maddox has a new fascination with Disney princess books.  I got a whole bunch of books from a yard sale a while ago but just got them out recently because Maddox is now old enough to read books with paper pages.  His favorite book is The Little Mermaid and his second favorite book is Sleeping Beauty.  We read a verse out of the Book of Mormon every night and then one of his princess books.  And he sleeps holding both books and one of his cars.  He is so adorable.  Maddox is still my baby and I love that he is still so affectionate.  I am so incredibly in love with him!

Jaxon's Baby Pics

A new mom to Jaxon

We have been so busy and I feel like the first couple months of Jaxon's life have flown by.  I want to start with him...my little angel.  Jaxon is a very particular baby.  I call him my bipolar baby because he goes from being extremely angry and screaming at the top of his lungs to smiling and cooing within seconds.  From early on he has shown us his temper.  He gets very angry if he is not being held and has his "mad cry".  He also is acutely aware of my presence and absence and cries when I leave his line of sight.  Jaxy always follows me around the room with his eyes.  I love it but it also makes getting things done difficult.  I have the found the swing and the carrier to be very useful with Jaxon.  With Maddox, I could put him down and lay him anywhere and he would be content.  But Jaxon will only sleep if he is being held or in the swing.  After buying batteries weekly to keep the swing functioning, we finally bought rechargeable batteries and they have been a lifesaver.  Whenever I leave the house I take the carrier with me.  Jaxon doesn't like his car seat either so I find it easier to attach him to me in the carrier.  I actually love it.  It's like I'm holding him but I can use my arms and hands.  He almost always falls asleep with his face buried in my chest.  I am so in love with him.  He just craves human touch.  And he really is so easy to please.  He stops crying almost immediately after I pick him up.  I have predicted that Jaxon is going to be really intelligent.  He is very vocal when cooing at me and it really seems like he is trying to talk to me.  And he does it every time I am nursing him.  He tries to talk to me and smiles when I talk back.  Jaxon loves to nurse and is super chubby!  He has a very round face and head and so his cheeks have gotten really chubby.  At his 2 month check-up he was pretty average though.  He was right around 65th percentile in height and weight.  But everyone always comments on how chubby he is.  Jaxon adores Maddox.  He instantly smiles when he sees him and loves watching Maddox run around.  It melts my heart to see my two little babies love each other so much.  My dream would be for them to be best friends.  Maddox has accidentally hurt Jaxon a couple of times but Jaxon is one tough baby.  My favorite moments have been in the mornings when Maddox has come into our bed and Jaxon is just waking up and we are all together snuggling.  Jaxy is always so happy in the mornings and stretches his chubby little arms above his head and gives me huge smiles.  Jaxon is such a good sleeper.  He sleeps in his swing every night from about 9 until 11 and then I move him into his crib.  He usually sleeps until about 2 but sometimes longer and then wakes up to nurse.  At that point he stays in bed with me.  There have been some nights where he nurses all night and other nights where he only nurses once.  But overall, as long as I am next to him, he sleeps like a log.  Jaxon also loves his baths.  He loves the warm water and it is the one time he is completely relaxed and still.  If I had to describe Jaxon, I would say he is restless, particular and beautiful and sensitive. I am so grateful for the baby he is.  It has been a completely different experience from having Maddox as a newborn but I love having a brand new experience and learning how to be a mother to a different child.  That really is the surprise of adjusting to two.  I am like a new mom all over again because they are so different.  But I love their differences and they are still so much alike.  Jaxon has truly brought so much joy into our family and I am so grateful to have been entrusted with such a precious angel.  He needs me so much and relies on me for everything.  I think I forgot what that was like and it took me a couple months to appreciate it but now, I am so happy and feel like I am so blessed to have another little angel.

Jaxon's Birth Story (by Dad)

Jaxon's Birth Story (by Mom)

I thought I knew what to expect and how I would feel upon having my second child.  After all, I had done this once before.  I was experienced.  However, Jaxon decided to surprise me in more ways than one.  Jaxon was born at 5:56 PM via c-section.  His birth had been delayed on more than one occasion and the surgery proved to be longer than anticipated.  After 26 minutes of pulling, tugging, a lot of pressure and pain, Jax finally made his appearance.  Right before he was born, I felt the most intense pain I had ever felt in my life and the moment he was born, I felt the most relief I had ever felt in my life.  After the doctors pulled him out, immediately, they lifted him above the curtain.  While in that moment of sweet relief, I saw my son for the first time.  The tears came pouring out of my eyes and I was completely overwhelmed with emotion.  Jax was this little angel above me.  The vision of him completely erased my memory of the bitterness of the pain I had just experienced and filled my heart with joy and gratitude.  Of course, I was grateful the pain had subsided but more than that, I was grateful for the miracle that is procreation.  Unlike Maddox's birth, this time, I was fully aware of what Jaxon would mean to us and how much love we would feel for him.  I understood that he would be an eternal part of me and our family.  The moment I held him in my arms and kissed him for the first time, I would feel that fierce, unconditional love for him that only a mother can feel.  Jax came out with a head full of dark hair and beautiful, dark eyes.  He did not turn out to be the huge 10-pound-baby the doctor predicted he would be.  But he was a little clone of Allan and Maddox exactly as I had predicted.  He was perfect in every way.  He was a peaceful baby and only cried when he was hungry.  He ate well, slept well and won over the hearts of the whole family including his big brother's.  Jax has taught me so much.  Namely, my heart is big enough for two children, I should be careful what I wish for (I had wanted to experience "the natural way" of having a baby and sure enough, I got a taste- pain.) and life does not always follow my plan.  And that's okay because Heavenly Father's plan is way better than mine.  I will be forever grateful for the little angel we were blessed with on August 13th- Jaxon Ray.  He has made our family complete.  

Welcome Jaxon Ray Draper!

Jaxon Ray Draper was born on Wednesday, August 13th at 5:56 PM via scheduled c-section.  He weighed 8 lbs 2 oz and measured 18 1/2 inches (with legs bent) and 21 inches at the doctor's office a couple days later.  We are so happy to welcome him to the family.  Our hearts are full of love and gratitude for a healthy, beautiful baby boy.

2 year old photo shoot

18 Month old pics

Almost 2...

So Maddox will be two in just over a month.  It's very hard to believe but he is definitely showing signs of the "terrible twos."  Tantrums have become a little more frequent and more dramatic but luckily, they are still pretty short-lived.  And Maddox is still a softy for cuddles and hugs and kisses.  After he gets his cries out and finishes with his tantrum, he comes to me to be held and snuggled.  I am so glad he hasn't learned how to be angry with me or blame me for why he can't always have what he wants.  I am treasuring the moments that he lets me hold him, kiss him and cuddle him because any day now he could just decide that he is a big boy.  But a part of me believes he will always be affectionate.  It seems to be in his nature.
Maddox is still very energetic and constantly running away to explore and get as far as he can before he is caught.  He has become a fast little runner.  His speech has progressed and he has been learning new words.  He now says "bye-bye" and "mine" and "uh-oh" is still his most frequently used word as he says it anytime he gets into something he's not supposed to or any time I turn off the TV which has encouraged me to watch less TV since he seems to think something is wrong if it's not on.  Maddox spends most of his nights sleeping on the floor by the door and has been very stubborn about sleeping in his own bed.  I feel really bad for him and hate that he is sleeping on the floor but Allan reminds me that if it was uncomfortable he would move. But Allan is also a little bias because he spent some of his childhood with out a bed and had to sleep on the floor.  I don't know what else I can do.  I put him to bed and as soon as I walk out he gets out of bed and runs to the door.  Then, I wait about an hour until he is asleep and I move him to his bed.  But every morning I find him back by the door.  I'm hoping he will grow out of it.
Maddox got to visit his cousins in Idaho for a couple weeks and loved his time there.  All of his cousins were so sweet with him.  Maddox was introduced to toy guns, fishing, boating and motorized toy tractors and jeeps.  He fell in love!  We had to pry him from the steering wheels each time as he fought to stay on kicking and screaming.
Overall, Maddox is a very good boy and is learning how to listen and how to be a good helper.  He loves helping me load the dishwasher and pour in the soap and turn it on.  He loves helping me bake cookies, pancakes and brownies.  And he loves getting himself dressed.  In fact, he refuses to let me help him get dressed until after an hour of him getting his head stuck in the arm hole, I insist on helping.
Maddox has become very attached to his Daddy and wants to do everything Daddy does.  He loves putting on Allan's tennis shoes and doing exercises with Allan.  Allan has been doing a program called P90X and Maddox has learned several yoga poses and how to use a push-up bar.  Maddox is also obsessed with sports especially baseball but he loves basketball too.  Every time we see a basketball or a hoop, he wants us to lift him up so he can throw the ball in.  Maddox is very technologically savvy and is able to easily navigate an iPhone and iPad.  He especially loves the camera app and loves taking pictures of random things around the house like the ceiling fan and the couch.
These past few months, I have been trying to accept that our lives are going to change drastically when the new baby arrives.  I know that my love for Maddox will not change but our relationship will.  I am hoping that I can balance both of my babies' needs and that Maddox won't feel abandoned or unloved.  This is my biggest fear.  At the same time, I want to give the new baby just as much attention and love as I gave Maddox.  I held Maddox all day when he was baby and he slept by my side every night.  I don't want Maddox to feel excluded and I want to spend our days snuggling and playing just as we do now.  I'm sure I will figure it out but becoming a mother of two is going to be a challenge.  I just hope Maddox stays patient with me and loves me through the process.    

a wild child with soft skin

So Maddox is 20 months old and time is flying by.  He seems to be approaching the "terrible twos" and has a new scream/screech that he uses when he wants something.  After the screams, he throws tantrums.  But he seems to get sad more often than mad.  He puts his face in his hands and hunches over as he cries very dramatically.  Or he'll run to a corner and cry or lay on the floor face down and cry.  It's very sad and that's exactly what I say in a sympathetic voice, "oh, that's so sad."  I want to acknowledge how he is feeling while at the same time hoping he realizes that unfortunately, his very dramatic tears don't let him play with knives or stand on top of the table.  Now to be clear, Maddox does get mad.  And when he gets mad, he hits and kicks and throws things.  Mostly, he throws things.  And it drives me crazy!  I had to clean up a box of cornstarch that he threw all over the kitchen, apple juice when he threw his sippy cup, water when he threw a vase of flowers, cheese puffs, cheerios, peaches and the list goes on.  I just have to remember that it's not the end of the world and almost every mess can be cleaned up.  But it still drives me crazy.  And after he throws something, he runs.  And he is one fast runner.  Maddox has recently developed an obsession with kitchen utensils his favorites being can openers and spatulas.  For some reason, he loves them.  Allan decided that Maddox is no longer allowed to play with can openers because when Allan was cleaning the couch the other day, he cut his finger open on the can opener that had been shoved in between the cushions.  Poor Maddox was devastated but has seemed to be satisfied with the spatulas.  Maddox is very much loved by his nursery leaders.  They told me last week that he is by far the wildest kid they have ever had and that my house must be a mess because he destroys everything in his path.  They said that he rips pictures off the wall and reaches things off of cabinets and tries to unstack the chairs.  But they love him and recognize that it's because he's curious and has so much energy.  His nursery leaders also said that he is the most affectionate kid they've ever had and loves to be held.  And that he has very soft skin.  Ha ha.  A couple weeks ago, Maddox gave us quite a scare.  After church, I went to go pick him up from nursery and he wasn't there so I assumed Allan had picked him up.  But when the teacher saw me, she gasped realizing that Maddox had escaped.  Apparently, when one of the parents came in, Maddox sneaked out.  I was not worried at all at first and decided that he couldn't have gotten very far.  I walked around the church asking people if they had seen him.  When I finished the first lap, I started getting nervous.  No one had seen him and more and more people were looking for him.  5 minutes went by, then 10, then 15.  I started panicking.  I was so worried that he had run outside and into the street.  Plus, our church is not in a very safe part of town.  I was so worried and started crying.  Finally, someone found Maddox playing by the piano in the chapel.  I was so relieved and when I held him in my arms, I started crying even more thinking of how precious he is to me.  I don't know what I would do without him.  He is my everything!  I think he was a little scared too because when he saw me he started crying.  He probably got a little nervous after being alone for so long.  Anyway, his nursery leader felt so bad but I told her that Maddox is a very fast runner and loves to escape.  If Allan and I ever leave the front or back door open, Maddox sprints outside and runs for his life.  We have a very active, wild, loving little boy but I wouldn't change him for anything.  The other day, I was doing laundry and he found his blankie in the dirty clothes.  I was actually given 2 of the same blanket and it has worked out perfectly because Maddox always has a clean one.  Well, on the same day I was doing laundry, his clean blankie was still out from his nap time.  So for the first time, Maddox realized that he had two blankies and it made him so happy.  He was snuggling both of them holding them up to his face and smiling.  It was the cutest thing.  He is so easy to please and such a happy little boy.  He loves being held and kissed by me.  In fact he will sit on my lap for as long as I want him to and just let me kiss him over and over again.  I am such a lucky mom!

Christmas and 18 months old

So Maddox had his second Christmas and it was a lot of fun.  We got him a balance bike which is a small bike without pedals.  It's designed to help him go straight to a real bike and skip training wheels.  He loves it.  He hasn't fully grasped all that he can do with it yet and just kind of scoots along while straddling it.  Eventually, as he gets more comfortable he will be able to coast and glide on it and go a little faster.  We also got him some books and bath toys.  Maddox got to spend a lot of time with his cousins before Christmas when my whole family came to visit.  Maddox loves his cousins and shows it by always giving them hugs.  Maddox has been talking a little bit more.  He says "ma,ma,ma,ma" for "mas" or "more" and he says "dada" a lot and "go go" to Cuni a lot.  He also says "hi" every once in awhile.  That's about it.  I also decided to completely eliminate hot dogs from his diet.  There is some research that states that the nitrites and nitrates in hot dogs are harmful and while this is disputable, I just decided it was time to move on.  After all, a hot dog a day can't be good for anybody.  So Maddox now eats chicken nuggets, quesadillas, pasta and fruit.  And I have stopped adding vanilla to his milk and every once in awhile I won't add any sugar either.  Maddox has a new favorite parent- Daddy.  I thought I would get a little jealous but it's actually really cute and makes me happy to see how much he loves Allan.  This morning when he woke up, he wanted Allan to hold him and then when Allan had to go to work, Maddox did not want to let go and did not want to come to me.  He was so sad to see Daddy go.  And when Allan comes home for lunch, Maddox gets so happy and hyper.  I think Maddox is probably getting bored with me considering we spend every second of every day together.  Allan and I are taking a trip to Vegas in February, just the two of us and I think it will be good for everybody.  Maddox still loves to climb on everything and still loves to dance.  He is also still very affectionate especially with little girls.  His nursery teacher told me that last Sunday he kept kissing all the girls.  And a couple weeks ago, when we were at the museum, a little girl was being mean to him and Maddox kissed her.  It surprisingly resolved the issue because the little girl was stunned and just walked away.  But I'm not sure how to teach Maddox when it's appropriate to kiss and when it's not.  I don't want him being that little boy who chases all the girls and threatens to kiss them.  I remember little boys like that and they were not cute.  So hopefully, he outgrows it on his own.  It doesn't seem to bother anyone right now and of course, I love that he is always giving me kisses.  Well Maddox turns 18 months old tomorrow and I can't believe it.  He is growing up so fast and has made me so proud.  He is such a sweetheart and is so sensitive and loving.  And even though he doesn't seem to be advanced intellectually, I know that he has a high level of emotional intelligence.  Plus, he may surprise us and turn out to be a genius.  I just read something about Einstein not talking until he was four and I thought of Maddox.  Ha ha.  I love Maddox and I am so grateful for who he is becoming.